Mission:
The retreats and monthly gatherings of Healing Your Soul emanate from Dr. DiPaolo’s Contemplative Internal Family Systems (C-IFS) model and ministry. The model integrates the wisdom of contemplative spirituality with the psychological approach of Internal Family Systems (IFS). The ministry seeks to help fellow travelers on the journey who seek growth, healing, and a greater connection with God.
On this page:
- What is Healing Your Soul? – Understanding the Model and Description of the Monthly Gatherings & Retreats
- Winter/Spring 2026 Series – “Mind, Body & Soul”
- Lent 2026 Retreat – “Coming Home to Grace: A Retreat on Forgiveness”
- Fall 2026 Retreat – “Healing Your Soul”
Click here to access Guided Meditations from past Healing Your Soul events
Click here for info on the St. Monica website
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What is Healing Your Soul?
Understanding the Model for Healing Your Soul
Internal Family Systems (IFS) is a transformative, evidence-based psychotherapy that helps people heal by accessing and loving their protective and wounded inner parts. We believe the mind is naturally multiple, and that is a good thing. Just like members of a family, inner parts are forced from their valuable states into extreme roles within us. We also all have a core Self, which is Imago Dei – made in the image and likeness of God. Self is in everyone. It can’t be damaged. It knows how to heal. By helping people first access their Self and connect with God, then come to understand and heal their parts from that core, IFS creates inner and outer connectedness.
Through this work, you will have the opportunity to get to know your internal family of parts. You’ll be invited to slow down and cultivate the capacity to be emotionally present to even the most vulnerable of parts within you. As the Apostle Paul tells us, “The parts of the body that seem to be weaker are the ones we can’t do without. The parts that we think are less important we treat with special honor.” (Romans 12: 22-23).
Why do we need Healing Your Soul?
It is often said that you are your own worst critic. Too often, you’ve been told that you have flaws, negative qualities, or characteristics that you have to get rid of to be healthy or have the type of life that you want. So you try and try, and while sometimes you may avoid or suppress them, they remain a part of you. Perhaps you even seek psychotherapy to support you in these efforts, and they still persist. You then feel worse and carry the shame of not getting over what you think you should be able to do. Self-criticism further compounds the problem.
The Contemplative IFS model turns this idea on its head. You are invited to embrace the parts of you that have these qualities, not get rid of them. Let me be clear, I am not suggesting that you like the damaging behaviors that these parts do. Rather it is getting to know and understand why the part of you engages in those behaviors that provide the trailhead toward healing.
Confusing? Let me offer a simple example. It is 5:30 in the evening, and you see your 5-year-old son reaching his hand into the cookie jar – mind you, this is 15 minutes after you’ve told him dinner is soon and that he cannot have a snack.
Scenario 1: In your frustration from an already overworked day, you lash out, “Bad boy! I told you you couldn’t have a snack! What are you stupid? Why don’t you listen to me? Go to your room!”
Scenario 2: You remain calm amidst the understandable frustration and say something in a lighter tone like, “Caught you, Bobby. I see you are really hungry and understand that you don’t want to wait until dinner, even if it means disobeying what I asked you to do. Come here; help me set the table and tell me why you had your hand in the cookie jar.”
We may cringe at the thought of responding like in the first scenario, but don’t we talk to ourselves in that very same way? With responses that instill shame and provide no opportunity for repair? What if we could talk to ourselves more like the second scenario – from a core message of love while being clear about boundaries around the behavior? This is the pathway espoused by Contemplative IFS, a challenging yet rewarding pathway that was modeled perfectly by Jesus.
For more information and resources about IFS, please see my “What is Internal Family Systems (IFS)?” page.
History
Healing Your Soul began with a retreat in October of 2022 which was repeated in April 2023. Inspired by the positive feedback, Monthly Gatherings were launched in June 2023 and are held on the second Wednesday of the month, at 7:00, in the Spirituality Center at St. Monica Catholic Community in Santa Monica.
For more information and to register for any event, please click here to be taken to the Spirituality Center at St. Monica webpage
Retreats
Healing Your Soul retreats are a full-day opportunity to get away and nourish your soul. You will receive a full overview of the Contemplative IFS model. You will learn and experience your Core Self and your internal family of parts: Exiles, Managers, and Firefighters. You will also be led through a three-step contemplative healing process which will invite you to turn toward, be with, and invite love to a burden that you are carrying.
Retreats will include presentations, meditations, and time for personal reflection and discussion. There are fees for retreats, however, nobody is turned away because of cost. Please let us know if you are in need of financial assistance.
Monthly Gatherings
Monthly gatherings provide ongoing opportunities to do the all-important work of nourishing your soul and are offered every 2nd Wednesday of the month at 7:00 in the Spirituality Center at St. Monica. Each gathering will explore one area in greater depth through presentation, guided meditation, time for personal reflection, and discussion.
All are welcome, whether you’ve attended a previous retreat or not. Each evening will be a standalone event designed to help us continue the ongoing work in which we seek growth, healing and connection to God.
This ministry is offered as a service to our community. There is no fee to attend; donations are welcome to support the work. The suggested donation is $10; no amount is too small or too large.
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2026 Winter/Spring Series: Mind, Body & Soul
2nd Wednesdays of the Month
January 14, February 11, April 8, May 13, June 10
7:00 – 8:30
The Spirituality Center at St. Monica
Are you seeking something new for yourself this year?
As we begin 2026, Healing Your Soul continues with the series, Mind, Body & Soul—an invitation to tend to the whole person. This series offers a space to explore how emotional well-being, psychological insight, and spiritual growth belong together. Healing Your Soul is where your psychology and spirituality meet, integrating Internal Family Systems (IFS) psychology with contemplative spirituality in a way that is practical, grounded, and deeply human.
This series may be especially meaningful if you are:
- Desiring greater wholeness in mind, body, and spirit
- Curious about the connection between emotional health and spiritual life
- Seeking healing, self-understanding, or interior freedom
- Interested in psychology presented through a faith-informed lens
- Looking for a welcoming community—no prior experience required
Each gathering includes teaching, guided meditation, and time for personal reflection. All are welcome as we begin the New Year with intention and hope.
Click for Info & Registration on the St. Monica website
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Coming Home to Grace: A Retreat on Forgiveness
Saturday, March 14, 2026
9:00 – 3:30
The Spirituality Center at St. Monica
Forgiveness is an essential part of the Lenten journey, as it mirrors the grace and mercy that God extends to us. Just as Lent is a time of purification and renewal, so too is forgiveness a process of releasing burdens that weigh us down. By embracing forgiveness as a Lenten practice, we participate in the deeper work of spiritual growth, allowing God to heal us and make us whole.
“How do I forgive?”
Luke’s Gospel presents a powerful lesson on forgiveness through Jesus’s parable of the prodigal son. This is truly a story of two lost sons. The prodigal squanders his inheritance on reckless living and returns home in desperation, expecting rejection but receiving love. Meanwhile, his older brother, though outwardly obedient, harbors resentment and self-righteousness. The true model of forgiveness is the father, who meets each son where they are and embraces them both with unconditional love.
This story is beautifully depicted in Rembrandt’s painting, The Return of The Prodigal Son, housed at the Hermitage Museum in St. Petersburg, Russia. Inspired by both the parable and the painting, Henri Nouwen wrote a deeply moving reflection in his book The Return of the Prodigal Son.
Coming Home to Grace: A Retreat on Forgiveness
I invite you to participate in the Lenten retreat, Coming Home to Grace: A Retreat on Forgiveness, which will take place on March 14, 2026 at the Spirituality Center at St. Monica.
This retreat will guide us through the themes of Luke’s Gospel, Rembrandt’s masterpiece, Nouwen’s insights, and personal self-exploration. Through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS), we will explore how this timeless narrative helps us embrace our wounded parts, release burdens, and move toward forgiveness.
Whether you struggle to forgive yourself or someone else, this retreat offers wisdom, grace, and a deeper understanding of the self—making it the ideal Lenten journey.
Registration info will be posted in 2026
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The Healing Your Soul Retreat
Fall, 2026
9:00 – 3:30
The Spirituality Center at St. Monica
As a body is one though it has many parts, and all the parts of the body,
though many, are one body, so also Christ.
– 1 Corinthians 12:12
This in-person retreat invites you into deeper stillness and sacred exploration.ou’ll get to know your internal family of parts—those aspects of you that carry burdens, protect, or feel unseen—and learn how to meet them with compassion. Through meaningful teaching, guided meditations, and unhurried personal space, you’ll reconnect with your core self and the healing presence of God. Inspired by Romans 12, we’ll honor the hidden, tender parts of our inner world and create room for transformation.
The retreat will provide you the opportunity to get to know your internal family of parts. You’ll be invited to slow down and cultivate the capacity to be emotionally present to even the most vulnerable of parts within you. As Paul tells us, “The parts of the body that seem to be weaker are the ones we can’t do without. The parts that we think are less important we treat with special honor.” (Romans 12: 22-23).
Through a series of presentations, meditations, and time for personal reflection, you will be guided through a process to explore and bring healing to burdened parts of you and connect more fully with your core self and God.
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Past Retreat: Healing Your Anxious and Depressed Soul
October 21 – 9:00 – 3:30
In Romans, Paul tells us, “The parts of the body that seem to be weaker are the ones we can’t do without. The parts that we think are less important we treat with special honor.” Take a day to slow down and cultivate the capacity to give special honor to those vulnerable parts within you that carry stress, anxiety and depression.
Healing Your Anxious and Depressed Soul will…
- help you connect more deeply with your Imago Dei – your Core Self which is created in the image and likeness of God and is the place from which healing is possible.
- provide a holistic framework for understanding anxiety and depression, including its physical, mental, emotional, spiritual, and relational aspects.
- engage you in the Contemplative Internal Family Systems model which integrates the wisdom of contemplative spirituality with the psychological approach of Internal Family Systems (IFS)to safely get to know your anxious and depressed parts.
- offer you three invitations to bring healing to your burdened anxious and depressed parts.
The retreat will include presentations, meditations, and time for personal reflection.