It is easy to get mired in negativity.  The news is filled with it.   It’s all around us.  “Behind every silver lining is a dark cloud” some might say.  What if we changed our focus?  What if we looked at what’s right in the world and built upon that?  What if we looked at what’s right in our relationships and built upon that?

While it sounds great, it takes conscious action to make that a reality.  Because of the brain’s natural proclivity to focus on the negative we need to build specific habits to enable ourselves to focus on what’s right, what’s good.  Here are three steps to do it:

1.  Create a Vision for Your Relationship.  Businesses create a mission statement and strategic plan to keep everybody moving in the same direction.  Your relationship needs a tangible vision as well – a co-created document that states the dreams and intentions for your relationship.
2.  Practice daily actions to fulfill your vision.  Daily action is necessary to build good habits.  If your vision statement says, “We express a sign of affection each day,” then give your partner the hug and warm greeting when you see him/her after a busy day.  And do it every day.
3.  Practice gratitude.  Nothing reinforces your partner building new habits better than expressing gratitude when you see them in action.  Express appreciation to each other each day.   These three steps will create a buffer against negativity, and build a culture marked by celebrating what’s right in your relationship.

Create a vision and learn to celebrate what’s right in your relationship at my next Start Right, Stay Connected workshop on June 29.  Start Right Stay Connected is designed to provide committed, engaged and newly married couples the knowledge and skills to build a great marriage.   Click HERE for more info.